Creepin’ out

windmillsThese windmills are in Livermore. Something’s not right around there. My creep-o-meter goes off the scale with the needle pegging the red zone. I asked hubby what the deal was. He said there’s been a bunch of UFO sightings with reports like the craft floating down from the sky, nearing the highway and morphing into a car. I’m not sure I buy into that, but something’s wonky and it isn’t the windmills that aren’t turning when there’s plenty of wind.

Maybe it’s Lawrence Livermore Labs. Alliteration for security, I suppose. Look at their web site. Their front page lands you on a secured server. Do you need a secure server for their front page?

Hubby got us a tour of Lawrence Livermore Labs. That tour was a well-rehearsed play by Stepford wives or maybe our tour guide was an android. They gave us free pens and too many of them in too many colors.

The Caldecott Tunnel tour was much better, real and aberrant. Livermore Labs, learn from Caldecott Tunnel tours. You would raise less suspicion with people like me who have sensitive creep-o-meters.

Moving on to 9 pointer Richter creep-o-meter…
A mummy was discovered, and not even on an archeological dig, in the entrance way of a home in Piedmont. Piedmont is technically part of Oakland. The mummy had been an old lady who died about 5 years ago. Her daughter, undoubtedly Norman Bates’ sister, kept the property up after her mother’s death, paid the bills, and when anyone asked about her Mom, she told them her Mom was either on vacation or at her own house in Alameda. Today, the police are charging a “person of interest” in the “crime” with “interfering with remains.” Like that is going to stick. I think that was the problem. The daughter didn’t interfere with the remains, or the old lady would be interred or cremated. The old woman probably died in the entrance hall and her corpse lay there for 5 years on the stone cold tile. The autopsy has come back and indicates no foul play. The daughter can finally say, “Good-by Mommy Mummy, my Mummy dearest.” Maybe the daughter was a bad procrastinator, but you have to think of the stench. Hard to believe she walked around that gleefully.

Okay. That about does it for me. Gotta rummage in the garage a bit and look for my cat’s claw. It’s a little bitty maroon one that I’ve had for 30 years. I’m going to use it to wrench my creep-o-meter needle out of the red zone. Then I’m going to pretend I didn’t write that paragraph up there, the one about…you know…

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9 Responses to “Creepin’ out”

  1. The turbins may have been shut down for maintenance. I read about the mummy. Stranger things happen. The one that creeped me out was the Wake in PR. The funeral home fixed up the guy that died and had him standing in the corner as his wake. The had some pictures on Yahoo. Try a monkey paw…works great.

  2. Okay, the wake trumps the mummy. Where is PR? I gotta read about this. Just when I got my creep-o-meter reset. And picture too! Yikes!

  3. My Creepo Meter is set for humanoids only, UFO sightings happen all the time in Arizona, but I’ve never seen one, maybe the beings in UFO’s are looking for intelligent life and I just don’t qualify so they don’t buzz me. As for the mommy mummy, how could a daughter step over her dead mommy’s mummy day after day and not bet creeped out? I am to much of a neat freak to overlook the stench of a rotting corpse in my entry way, but then again who am I to judge.

  4. The “bet” was supposed be “get”

  5. Puerto Rico. Sorry, should have spelled it out.

  6. AZ, Bodies stink when they decay. I think the daughter isn’t all there. Mommy Mummy is dead in the entrance way and the daughter is out weeding the yard. I’m not judging. I just creeped out.

    Damn Steve. You win. That is creepier than the mummy. Did you see that picture. The brother is kissing the standing corpse. Excuse me. I have to go brush my teeth now. I went to my husband’s great uncle’s funeral. They were all kissing the corpse coming and going. Then the Father Funny Hat looked at me and said how he had put a special drape on Great Uncle’s forehead so I could come up and kiss the corpse. Everyone stopped and stared at that point. There are things I will do and things I won’t do and the creep-o-meter had gone into the red zone and the needle was pegged. So, Father Funny Hat stared at me and I stared back. They went on without me kissing the corpse. Ain’t kissin’ no dead folk.

  7. Oh I’m sorry for laughing but “Ain’t kissin’ no dead folk” cracked me up! I get it too. What I hate are comments like “looks like he’s sleeping”…no to me it looks dead! “he looks so natural”… ummm still looks dead! I decided that people are just so uncomfortable dealing with death that they can’t help but say stupid stuff. At my dad’s funeral I thought I would kill someone if one more person said to me ” Sorry for your loss”. I didn’t lose anything … my dad died! It was a big issue for me.
    And in the words of a dear friend….I ain’t kissin’ no dead folk either!

    Now onto the creep o meter…..I have never encountered a UFO or UFO type creature (that I know of). I do believe they are out there though. I experience the creeps going through areas just north of Atlanta. I can just feel eyes on me…….ewwwww!!! May I borrow your term of creep o meter?

  8. OMG, Connie! I’ve heard that all too – “looks like he’s sleeping” and “looks so natural.” I don’t know why people say that. I want to pipe up and say No and No and No.

    I agree with you on Atlanta. There is something weird about it. Feel free to steal creep-o-meter. Free for the taking.

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