Game Day

renovationMy neighbor, across the street, is re-roofing her house. This is my view from my itsy porch. Her house looks naked. Get it a bathrobe. The workers started banging around early this morning, too early for me to get out of bed and yell, “Shut up” out my front door. Some truck just came by, double parked in the street, and honked at the roofers for a solid 5 minutes. I went to the door to yell, “Shut up,” but the truck drove off. My “Shut up” waits. It’s loaded. The safety’s off. I’m gonna use it before the day is done.

The old Asian lady who combs through our recyclables wandered up our driveway again today. She’s gotten craftier. She takes her bag of garbage, hides it behind a bush in my next door neighbor’s yard, and then comes back for my house. She creeps way up my driveway to where my garbage cans are partially hidden behind my chimney, flips open the garbage can lid, which hits my window, and starts her plastics mining operation. That’s how the mess between her and me got started. I thought she was some n’er do well, breaking in through the side window. Today, I charged outside with the Big Dog in tow. She acted startled but I’ve learned that’s just her game face. This is my standard lecture for her.

“No. NO. NO. Do not come up driveway. Not up here. NO. No. NO.”

Then she nods and laughs like, “Let the games continue next Tuesday.” I’m toying with the idea of either a rubber snake or a translator. I can’t decide which would make a bigger (better?) impression.


6 Responses to “Game Day”

  1. Oh hi! I’ve been gone for a bit, got tangled up in some medical paper work for the Mr. It was like 10 years worth of medical records: letters, attachments, graphs, reports, all manner of stuff, and some of this stuff was in triplicate, now imagine the nurse at the hospital carrying all this paper and then dropping the entire mess on the floor. She kinda shoved all the stuff in its folder not caring that everything was out of order and tossed like a garden salad. So the Mr. got home he says: “Can you help me get all this back in order?” So that’s were I’ve been knee deep in paper, but it’s done now and I’m back!

    As for your neighbor, the only question I’ve got is why did she wait until the hottest time of the year to replace her roof. She should have done it when it was cooler, just sayin’ because I’ve been on a roof helping the Mr. lay asphalt shingles and it’s a job best done in the spring or fall.

    I had neighbor kids that used to use my yard for their amusement, they had their own yard, but it was not landscaped and it didn’t have Malibu lights, so they used to come and play in our front yard. I would yell at them not to play in our yard, but they didn’t pay any attention to me. They finally left, they were renters, they finally got tired of getting letters from the HOA because they were constantly letting their dogs run free and they were big dogs and they kept crappin’ in everybody’s front yard, I was never so happy to see a family go in my entire life, it’s amazing how one family can ruin an entire neighborhood.

  2. That makes me so mad. It’s like the doctors want you to bring all this paperwork to their office and either they dig through it like a mole or someone drops it and could care less. I can’t wait until we get socialized medicine, even less concerned people, if you can imagine. I hope you got it all put back together.

    I chuckled at your weather remark only because I remember what it is like in Phoenix this time of year. HOT! But it’s not like that here. We are having problems breaking 80 degrees. Yesterday we made it to 79. Today Weather Buggy says our high will be 69, so you can add 5 – 10 degrees onto that. It’s overcast and foggy. I don’t think we will get above 75, unless the fog burns off. We can’t reroof in a few months because our rainy season will start. My neighbor is trying to beat that.

    I wish it was just one family of garbage mongers but it is a whole sect of the civilization, mostly old Asian women. They bring garbage bagfuls of leaking recyclables on the bus. I’ll have to get a picture. I don’t mind it if they want to go through the cans when I push them down to the road, but they come up on our property and paw around. Not the thing to do in Oakland.

  3. You know the hardest thing about trying to figure out medical records is that you can’t read anything that been hand written by a doctor, it all looks like chicken scratch, and Doctor’s don’t put “enc.” when there are enclosures included with correspondence. I’m so accustomed to lawyer’s they are sticklers for listing enclosures, courtesy copies, blind courtesy copies, dictated by not read, all manner of information on a cover letter, doctor’s don’t bother so rebuilding a file is near impossible.

    Silly me, I’ve been to San Francisco and you’re right it doesn’t get real hot there, but you’d be amazed that even at 80° it gets pretty warm on the roof of a house, I don’t know if it’s the black roofing paper but roofs get hot.

    When I lived in Shooter’s World (aka 35th Ave and Van Buren) we used to get all manner of people rifling through our recycle wheelie bin. I put a stop to that real quick by not putting aluminum cans in the wheelie bin, I would put cardboard, glass, Styrofoam, egg cartons in the wheelie bin, but all aluminum cans stayed on the back porch until I saw my favorite scavenger walking down the street, and then I carry the bags out to the street and give him all my aluminum cans. It worked out well for both of us he didn’t have to dig for two or three cans at a time, and I totally eliminated the scavengers on recycle day.

    • Doctors’ handwriting is impossible to read. It still makes me so mad they dropped your hubby’s records and then just gave them back to him like, “You fix it.” Creeps.

      They had like 4 people on the roof today. I stood on the porch and stared at them for a while and wondered if they were hot. We didn’t break 80 and the sun did come out.

      ha ha… Shooter’s World. I have to steal that one. If I wasn’t so damn lazy I would do hold back the recycling too, but I swear lately it’s all I can to bath before Hubby comes home. Motivation is zero around here, so the garbage mongers are on their own unless they get up by the house.

  4. The rubber snake is no good. I’ve been to Taiwan many years ago, and they eat snake soup. Would you call that a stereotype comment?

    • I don’t think it’s stereotype. I think it is money saving because I won’t my $$$ on the rubber snake. I’ll have to pony up the dough for a translator though you’d think “no” was pretty understandable.

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