Buh Bye Crack Phone

My brother called me with a new phone number this week. He has one of those $15 cheap-o phones with purchased minutes. Their web site advertises “No bills. No contracts. No surprises. You’re in control.” This part, “No surprises. You’re in control.” makes me want to sign up ASAP, but I think they might be talking about their phone service and not life in general, as evidenced by my brother when he leaned over a barrel at his machine shop, and the Tracfone (or as we call it, the crack phone) slipped out of his shirt pocket, and went swimming in a vat of oil. There would have been a burial at sea but my brother’s reflexes were quick enough to retrieve the oil murdered phone. He drove to his gas station and got a new phone with a new number. When I asked him about the new number he told me someone from our old high school had tracked him down, sending him snail mail first, and demanding his phone number later.

“I guess you showed them,” I said. “They can’t call ya now.” Just for kicks, I called my brother’s old crack phone, the one that was dead. It wanted to take a message, a message my brother can’t retrieve. Score another one for our unending belligerency against our high school, 30 years after the fact, I might add. Unfortunately, the crack phone had to pay with its life in that war, but we knew there would be casualties.


8 Responses to “Buh Bye Crack Phone”

  1. I have a cell that I leve in the glove box of the car for emergencies. No monthy charge and I add time to it. Draw back for me. I didn’t put any money in and hadn’t used it in a year. The account was closed and the money was lost. Found out I have to add a little to it every 6 months to keep it active. They always have a way to get you.

  2. That school can track you down anywhere … I swear! They must be connected with Big Brother! Keep taking care of that finger!!

    • I know. We need to make a bumper sticker, Connie, that says “Watch out for Lulu.” That woman is like a bloodhound.

  3. Reunion committees are like blood hounds, they seem to sniff me out no matter how many years have gone by. They found me for the 10th, 20th, 30th, and 40th reunions, I’ve never attended, but they always take the time and trouble to track me down.

    • I think I read your comment and stole your word – bloodhound. I am such a ditz. But agreed. These people are human bloodhounds. we should retaliate. But how? I know. We will never go to the reunion.

  4. Monte McClain Says:

    on the “Wire” they call them burners….we joke at our place about the Iburner….maybe Mac will make a throw-awayable iphone….that’d be fun and environmentally destructive.

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