Archive for May, 2010

Mem Day Weekend

Posted in general weirdness, life, travel on May 28, 2010 by Nada

The dogs will be holding down the fort (that one that they’re lying on) for us while we go to Tomales Bay, Saturday and Sunday. We decided to vacate the premises at the last minute. I called a few places for room reservations, but apparently everyone in the bay area has decided to vacate their premises and head to Tomales Bay. One place said they had one room available for $360. I told them they would be keeping that one too. I would sleep in the car before I would part with 360 of my clams for one night. We finally found a place to stay. It’s the sister property of some other place, and it’s mid renovation. I looked up the reviews on the internet and it was chock full of complaints about the smell and old rooms with scratched furniture. Other people had written in about road noise, and someone even complained about a baby crying all night long. On another message board, apparently the parents of the crying baby wrote in and said their baby was crying because of the smell. I booked the room anyway because it was the only one I could find that didn’t require a second mortgage on our house.

I called the Big Guy at work and told him the news. He said, “I can take anything for one night but the smell. Can you cancel?”

“No, I can’t,” I said. “The cancellation period was last week.”

“How is that possible?” he asked. “You only booked the room 10 minutes ago.”

“It’s their policy,” I said, and left it at that because there’s no explaining at a certain point in a conversation, a marriage, or life in general.

When the Big Guy came home he perused the internet for the possibly source of the smell in our room at the resort under renovation.

“It’s okay,” he said. “It’s not the rooms that stink. It’s the whole bay.”

I nodded, even though I found that more alarming than just one room. So we will be off tomorrow to some place in Tomales Bay that smells bad, with a lot of noise and bad furnishings. I can hardly wait. Seriously. Nothing like a road trip, even a bad one.

While the Big Guy was surfing the net, he also found out the “resort” where we’re staying has some sort of sunset kayak trip for 3 hours. He was going to make a reservation, but I stopped him.

“We probably have one bad reservation too many as it stands,” I told him.

Useless Crap and Fried Pies

Posted in computer, food, general weirdness on May 25, 2010 by Nada

Google’s put up this new left side bar. It looks like this. Useless crap. It says “Everything.”

I could go on a rant right here, but that’s useless too. Instead, I climbed on a kitchen chair and got into the cabinet where the Big Guy keeps the cooking sherry. I’m drinking enough to make me quit flipping google off every time I search for something on internet which is about every 2 seconds. “Here’s ‘Everything’ right here on my left nav and you have NOTHING.”

Google, you might think I have nothing but at this very minute, I have a refrigerator full of fried pies. FRIED PIES. Say that with a Southern accent, Google.

The fried pie tale is one that started when the kid’s were visiting from Texas. They took the Park Avenue and drove to Fresno to visit friends. One of their friends there is a fried pie vendor and gave them a boxful. I ignored that whole scene because as a rule there are two things Californian’s can’t make: one is fried chicken and the other, fried pies. The kids actually left before I took a bite out of one of the pies they left behind. As painful as it is to admit this, I was wrong. Horizon Snack Foods makes an All-American fried pie that’s every bit as good as any Southern fare.

I ate the pies the kids left and then it took me a while to find some more of them. I had to put out an APD with my friend and she found them in some random Lucky’s in her neck of the woods. I went to Target and tried to make the Hispanic food manager understand me when I said, “Fried pie” which turned into yelling, “fried pie” because she kept saying, “What?”

Finally I said, “You don’t even know what a fried pie is, do you?” That’s practically un-American. And say that with a Southern accent. “Un-amer-eh-can.”

King of the House

Posted in animal on May 23, 2010 by Nada

Turkey Breast

Posted in food, life on May 17, 2010 by Nada

As promised a picture of ye old turkey breast, which unfortunately tasted like ye old shoe leather. The Big Guy’s a good cook but we have one pan here that is an absolute traitor, even though it cost a small fortune. It is ye old crock of…

Boneless Turkey Breast

Posted in food, way back, weather with tags on May 10, 2010 by Nada

It’s rainy and cold. Bah. I don’t think it crawled above 55 degrees today. I wish I had nickel for every time I complained about the weather. I wish I had a nickel for every time I said, “I wish I had a nickel.”

My stepdaughter and her husband are coming into town tomorrow. I’m supposed to be cleaning the house. Am I? No. Why? Because I have a procrastination gene that is not recessive. It’s dominant. I will probably get up at 6am and act like a whirling dervish with a vacuum and a dust rag. I need to paint the front door but I only came to that realization 45 minutes ago, and I have no paint, and it’s raining.

The Big Guy is making a fresh boneless turkey breast stuffed with dates, apricots, and spices along with homemade mashed potatoes for their first dinner. I’m in charge of desert. I’m serving Oreo Cakesters, the chocolate miniature 100 calorie packs. Everyone gets their own little pack. I’m trying to keep the dinner classy.

My cousin called me today to tell me the gate to the family farm in Nashville that got submerged and summarily shorted out will be $3500 to repair, and the insurance in that area is not paying for any flood damage. When I lived on the farm we had an old wire gate where the electronic gate is now. I called it chicken wire, though it wasn’t. The wire squares were too big for chickens. It was a dilapidated old gate, and scraped the ground when we opened or closed it.

We had another one like it where the drive forked to go to our house, and one day my mother was daydreaming as she drove up the driveway and ran over the gate. There was a bunch of slow mo scraping on the hood and undercarriage of the car and a lot of screaming by us kids. Mom kept la la-ing her way on up the driveway smoking her cigarette, pretending like it was the most normal thing in the world to run over a gate. The screaming was so out of hand at one point, Mom leaned over and calmly said, “Shut up.”

Jay Jay for Mayor

Posted in animal, mayor, Montclair, Montclair Pet and Wildlife Fund on May 9, 2010 by Nada

The serious political machine of Montclair, California. May the best man, er beast, win.
jay jay for mayor

Crazy, Crazy, Crazy

Posted in animal, cars, general weirdness on May 5, 2010 by Nada

This slug is living under the birdbath. It’s crazy, really. The birdbath is right next to my driveway, and in between my house and the house next door. The driveway is always warm, heated by the concrete on the drive and surrounded by stucco homes, absorbing the sunlight. Even if a wind tries to blow up the drive, my stucco garage stops it. I call the area where the slug lives, Fort Lauderdale. And I clean out the birdbath every few days. I always tell myself, “Mind the slug. Don’t drop the birdbath on him.” And every time the birdbath slips out of my hands, and I drop it squarely on the slug’s back. And yet, he’s still there, and growing.

This flower is growing in our pot on the patio. It’s crazy. Why? Because it looks like something that wants to eat the small dog.

There is a street corner by our vets that the Big Guy and I refer to as Crazy Corner. We’ve never seen anything like it, and we are used to Oakland drivers. People run the stop signs. They try to run over pedestrians, and yesterday this happened. No one was hurt, but sheesh.