Another one…

Tomorrow, I have yet another appointment with yet another neurologist. This one is my fault because I fired the neurologist that was treating my epilepsy. The epilepsy docs I lost before him were not my fault. My HMO kicked them out of my plan.

This last neurologist got fired because of a personality conflict, which is code for he’s an asshole. Anyway, I had a migraine yesterday and the start of one all day today. I have some Dilaudid in my medicine chest I am seriously thinking about ingesting. I’ve already tried Aleve and 800mgs of Ibuprofen to no avail. The Dilaudid seems kind of seamy, in a back alley LSD trippy way to knock a headache on its ass with a crocket mallet. As Dr. Asshole said, “I never treat migraines with narcotics. It makes them worse.” Maybe, and then again maybe it stops the pain. His other statement, which is my personal favorite, “I don’t think just because you have migraines and partial complex seizures you shouldn’t be at work.” I’d love to know what company I could work for that would let me take hundreds of sick days a year, blank out on the job, and have pitfalls in my memory. Forklift driver comes to mind almost immediately.

That statement was the final separation of Dr. Asshole and me. That, and the fact I had been in his employment program to get an f’in job for two years and got kicked out because they couldn’t find me a job with my uncontrolled seizures. Maybe he should read his own files once in a while, the jerk, butthead, freak, useless lanyard, expired bus pass.

And no, I would not call myself a difficult patient, a name calling one perhaps, but even so, his mouth is far worse than mine because as he said, “You know I’m involved in a lot of research. That’s why you’ve been unable to reach me.” Geez, that cost my insurance two trips to the ER, total of $12 grand. But research is important, so I’m wondering why he doesn’t do just that and leave the doctoring to someone else who has the time. It’s a win-win-win situation. He uses his mouth on research assistants who could give a shit less. I get to see his associate and my insurance company saves money.

At this point, I think the Dilaudid sounds pretty good.

4 Responses to “Another one…”

  1. Whether the Dilaudid kills the pain or simply makes you not care, the end result is what’s important. The doctor (my dad, my uncle and my grandfather were all doctors) sounds like he should be doing only research, not dealing with patients. It’s not just the time, it’s the inclination.

    • I like that last sentence, Gene. It’s so true. Sounds like a southern phrase.

      The headache went away suddenly. That’s how they are without further medication.

      My Dad was a doctor too. We should form a club – COD – children of doctor’s. I tell everyone I’m half doctor now. My sister and I are sharing my dead dad’s medical degree.

  2. Jeebus woman you’re funny even with the headache! I don’t know what to say about doctors, I’ve never met one who helped me, I mean they did surgery and stuff, and I survived, but the “I am God” complex is hard to take. I’ve had doctors dismiss everything I had to say as irrelevant, hell they met me three minutes ago, so of course they know my body better than me, I’ve only been living in the dang thing it for 61 years. I’ve been disregarded so many times I’ve come to the conclusion that I want to die ala “surprise demise.” I just don’t what to know what’s going to kill me, I just wanna go without the aid of some quack standing over me and telling me what hurts doesn’t hurt because he says it doesn’t hurt. I can live, or die, without any more of that nonsense. Sorry I got off on a tangent, forklift operator sounds good to me.

    • OMG! I laughed so hard at “surprise demise.” And I agree. I want to be rid of these “I am God” quack-a-roos who can tell me everything about my body even though, as you said, I’m the freaking one in it.

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