Yosemite and the Little Knife

We have relatives visiting from Michigan. We all went to Yosemite. You can fill in the blanks here. Blah, blah, blah beautiful. Blah, blah, blah, hiking. Blah, blah, blah Half Dome, that’s as in sunset, and not my forehead. I had a good time, blah, blah, blah.

Next subject…I had to buy a new knife. I was going to write, “if you can believe it.” But I’m sure you can believe I laid my old knife down somewhere and either 1) lost it, or 2) forgot where it was, or 3) someone picked it up. My fault on all accounts. It was a great knife – an out the front switchblade. I can’t get another one exactly like it. They don’t make them any more. I’m sad, but as I said, “My own damn fault.”

I went to the army navy surplus store in Alameda and bought a new knife for $12 because I’m cheap and I need a knife worse than a car. And yes, I have a variety of knives at the house, but I need a pocket knife that’s not going to scare the be-jesus out of passerbys as I break down boxes. The new knife is small, metal, and sharp. It has a tiny steel button on the side to flip it open. I liked it. Notice the past tense – “liked.” I “liked” it until I leaned up against a counter and accidentally pressed the tiny button that opens the little knife. It flipped open in my pocket and cut my pants. Now, I’m mad at the Indians at the army navy surplus store who sold me the cheap knife that practically stabbed me in my thigh. Yes, I will take the blame for losing my good knife, but it’s best if rednecks work the army navy surplus stores. They would have said something about that little knife before I bought it, something to the effect of, “Ya betta be careful of that little bugger. It’ll open up in your pocket and slice something, maybe something valuable.”


4 Responses to “Yosemite and the Little Knife”

  1. Great story. It’s been a long time since I was last in Yosemite. Yeah, those little stickers can be a problem, Glad you didn’t get cut. Are you talking about American indians or the ones that get all of the outsourcing for computer problems?

    • The outsourcing Indians. I like army navy surplus stores but I’ve never seen outsourcing Indians running one. Seems like an odd fit to me.

  2. My ex father-in-law put a razor knife in his back pocket and when he bent over he stabbed himself in the butt!

    Glad to hear you had a good time at Yosemite, I’ve never been there so I really enjoyed the blah blah blah tour :0) !

    • OMG! I laughed so hard. That’s one thing I don’t need is a stab in the butt. On second thought, maybe I do. Some people have suggested I just carry a box cutter, and though that is a good idea because I’m breaking down boxes, it’s too long. I’m very short waisted.

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