Doctors Appointments

Tomorrow, I have to go see my epilepsy doctor, and he’s a cool guy, but he just can’t remember my name or anything related to my epilepsy. He always thinks I’m on some medicine I’m not taking. I keep asking him to numb my head so I can get out of this cycle of migraines, and he keeps saying he’s working on it. Sometimes I think I’m the one with brain damage and then sometimes I think…nah…it’s him. I’ve already decided if he asks me again what medicine I’m taking, I’m going to tell him LSD. He should know what I’m taking. He should quit asking me. He’s prescribing the crap. I love to say the word “crap.” Maybe I’ll just say that to the doc when he asks me what medicine I’m take. “Crap. Just crap,” or “Mostly cat crap.”

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8 Responses to “Doctors Appointments”

  1. feel better. maybe start tai chi or yoga? it might helP?

    • I used to do yoga and I need to get back to it, but I keep saying that about most exercise these days. “I need to get back to it.”

  2. Our phones and internet connection has been out all weekend. Internet finally came back on. Just in time to read you post. Enjoyed it.

  3. Dang! What happened to your phones and internet? Was it that wind? Looks like high velocity.

  4. My favorite it when a doctor asks: “So, what’s the matter?” and I have to say: “I don’t know, I thought YOU were the doctor.” My sister and I have come to the conclusion that diagnosis really means “if I happen to run into what ails you I’ll let you know, but in the meantime let me ply you with the latest pharmaceutical.”

    Which reminds me, one of the lawyers I used to work with could never remember his secretary’s name, he’d poke his head out the door and call her “hey you.” After a year she quit, and when I walked into his office to deliver some work, he asked “do you know why what’s her name quit?” He didn’t have a clue that she was upset because he didn’t know her name. I, on the other hand, made myself memorable, every time I typed up one of his arbitrations, he’d say “what do you think?” and I’d say “fire his ass!” It made him laugh every time, and he always remembered my name.

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